STEPSISTER:
It isn't easy being the ugly stepsister. Everybody always feels so sorry for
poor little Cinderella, but what about me? I deserve a little sympathy, too.
Does MY fairy godmother ever turn up with a magic wand? Does the prince ever
dance with me at the ball? Not on your life. The best I can ever hope for with
my pumpkins is a decent piece of pie. And as for the rats, well, rats are rats,
with their sneaky eyes and skinny tails, nibbling and gnawing at the garbage. I
never saw one yet who turned into a coachman.
If
you ask me, that Cinderella is weird. Certainly, she isn't normal. Besides the
fact that she has naturally curly hair and wears size 4 1/2 shoes, she is so
good-natured that it's downright sickening. If you had to dust and sweep and
clean all day long, would you go around singing to the birds? Of course you
wouldn't. No sensible person would.
A
lot of people think I'm jealous of her. Maybe I am. And with good reason. I
subsisted on seven hundred calories a day for three whole weeks before the
ball. I did my leg-lift exercises faithfully. I got a perm and a facial and a
manicure. I even bought a new gown. Blue velvet. Designer label. I mean, I was
READY. PRINCEY, I thought to myself, HERE I COME!
And
what happens? Little Cindy, who has never seen the inside of a health club in
her life and who doesn't know the caloric difference between a carrot stick and
a chocolate eclair, whips together a dress out of some old curtains from
K-Mart, waltzes off to the ball and snags the prince.
It
isn't fair! It really isn't fair!
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